Same weight, different date

February 12, 2012

Superbowl Sunday. Giants vs. Patriots. AGAIN! The last time these teams faced each other was 2008 and back then I was fat and not-so-happy.  I remember the day well because it was a major turning point for me.  I couldn’t find anything to wear for the Superbowl party and compensated for it by putting on a full face of makeup.  As if that would take attention away from my muffin top!  After that party, some pictures were posted on Facebook and the sight of myself scared me into a Weight Watchers meeting.  After that, I lose 23lbs.  Truly a milestone for me.

Four years later and a lot has happened.  I lost 23lbs, got married, gained the weight back, had a baby and went back to work.  Since giving birth to my son, I’ve lost 28lbs!  I started going to yoga!  My cholesterol is lower.  In short, I feel great.  The truth is, I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight.  But, my pre-pregnancy weight was nothing to brag about.  Remember I’d gained all that weight back?  So essentially now I’m right back where I started on Superbowl Sunday of 2008.

But, things couldn’t be more different when I look in the mirror.  Now that I’ve got a regular 3x a week Bikram Yoga practice my body looks better!  Toned, a bit tighter, just a little bit trimmer around the legs, arms and stomach.  Don’t get me wrong, I still have a LONG way to go (don’t have a 6 pack yet!), but this is a huge leap forward for me.  I’ve never been able to keep any kind of exercise program going.  My first yoga class was back in November and since then I’ve taken 55 classes, or an average of 3 per week.  I did a 30 day challenge for crying out loud.  This give me great confidence!  When I’m in yoga and not feeling it or having trouble with a particular pose I just say to myself “Marie, you did a 30 day challenge, you can do this!”  Sad to say, but I need this confidence boost every now and then, becuase to me, I am not the “yoga type”.  I’m not someone who “goes to the gym” or “owns a yoga mat”.  But I am, I do.  Who have I become?

Having my son and dealing with gestational diabetes has really put things in perspective for me. (Oh and turning 30 – forgot to mention that!)  Having gestational diabetes puts me at a higher risk for Type 2 diabetes and that’s a scary thought.  I’m also worried because Type 2 runs on both sides of my family, so I really need to be careful.  I realize now that I have to take care of myself if I want to be healthy and happy.  I have to actually make an effort to be well fed and exercised to reduce the risk of diabetes.  This is serious stuff!  I hate to admit it, but sometimes we have to be scared by something to really make a change in our lives.  And I am!

Now, my non-negotiables are yoga 3x a week (no matter what) and cooking healthy meals 5x a week.  This is my baseline expectation for myself every week so I can lead a healthy lifestyle.  The scale may not reflect it, but I am not the same as I was the last time I was this weight.  I’m in control now.  Eating and exercising and enjoying a better body.  Just more proof that the number on the scale is only one piece of the puzzle!

The 30 Day Challenge: Day 1

November 25, 2011

On Monday, after a week worth of serious contemplation and planning, I decided to embark on the infamous Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge.  At Bikram Yoga Park Slope, where I normally practice, the 30 Day Challenge is defined as “taking 1 class every day for 30 days in a row” after which you receive a month of free yoga to fulfill a 60 Day challenge.  Why, you ask, would I want/need to do this? Well…

Back in late July I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, Dylan, at 8lbs 4oz.  Since then I have been on maternity leave from my job.  It’s been a magical time of bonding with my baby and enjoying being home and a housewife.  But as you know, all good things must come to an end so, on December 5th I go back to work.  With the clock ticking I started going to Bikram Yoga again 2 weeks ago in an attempt to get rid of some of the baby weight.  Since Dylan’s birth I’ve lost a considerable amount of weight, but I’m still not at my “pre-pregnancy weight” and my jeans from that era were fitting just barely (muffin top!).  I finally got sick of feeling and looking like the Pillsbury dough boy.  Now I know, I just had a baby!  I mean, I have a great excuse for being overweight.  But, I don’t want excuses to stay unhealthy and unhappy.

I’ve been breastfeeding this entire time and for a while that was a great excuse not to diet or exercise.  One of these days I will write an entire post on breastfeeding and how challenging it is to do.  It’s also rewarding which I why I am still doing it.  But it’s a big time commitment and it really ties you to your baby (as if you weren’t tied down already!).  Now that I’ve mastered breastfeeding, I decided I had to try and do something healthy for myself and take advantage of what’s left of my maternity leave.  I came to grips with the fact that Dylan is going to have more formula bottles per day while I am at yoga and that is Okay.

After flirting with the idea of the 30 day challenge for 2 weeks I finally asked Ran what he thought.  He is always so supportive and proclaimed, “Of course you can do it!”.  I made a calendar and cross referenced it with the yoga schedule and Ran’s work schedule to find out if I really could attend 30 classes in 30 days.  There were some gaps, but nothing major that couldn’t be fixed with a hired babysitter and asking some friends and family for help.

Then the fear set in.  What if I can’t do it?  What if it’s too hard?  What if it’s too painful?  I was freaking out Monday before the 5:30 class I was planning to attend.  I got lazy and stayed on the couch and over ate.  Man, was I uncomfortable!  I was so scared to take on a new challenge I ran right to my comforts: TV and Food.  Then I figured  – I have nothing to lose by trying.  I have to lose weight.  I have to get healthy.  I know this.  I want this.  Even if I fail, I still win because I tried.  I went to class, I did the postures and got the benefits.

Ran came home from work Monday and I asked him to take some “Before” pictures of me.  I made sure to put on my most ill-fitting outfit so they would look horrific, and believe me – they did! And then, I went to class and signed up for the 30 day challenge.  I have taken the first step. Stay tuned.  I will only post those frightening “Before” pictures when I have some amazing “After” pictures to put alongside it. Namaste!

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